Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
Randomize
