Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
I’m gonna stop you right there. The last time you had a “brilliant” idea, I woke up to my kitchen covered in flour and a javelin through my tv.
Randomize
