we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
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