I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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