i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
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