he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
Randomize
