How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
Thank you for holding my vodka while the police let me ride their horse.
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
Randomize
