Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Randomize
