You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
You're a waste of cheezeits
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
God I love dating single dads. They've got their shit at least a little bit together and there's always snacks after sex. #nakedfruitrollups
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
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