She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
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