can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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