so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
Randomize