Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
Are we still banned from the library?
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize