is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
Tinder date just called. I was supposed to be there 30 minutes ago but I'm on a 27 game win streak in Park...?
Fuck that man! Tell her your dog died or something. Reschedule that shit, you can't stop 2K at a time like that. Ball is life bro... Priorities.
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
Randomize
