I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
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