If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
Randomize
