the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
Randomize
