my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
Randomize
