she takes plan B like it's going out of style
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
