did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Randomize
