Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
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