i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
Randomize
