the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
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