Joe is yelling at the trees again.
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
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