love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
