how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
Randomize