Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
do herpes really smell.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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