so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize
