I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
My butt remains clenched, sir.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
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