i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
