Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
Randomize
