I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize