My friends, they love my intelligence
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
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