i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
everyone is single if you try hard enough
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
Randomize
