I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
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