She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
I ran out of diet so I'm mixing captain with a juice box. Being a mom has finally paid off.
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
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