so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
Randomize
