She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
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