I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
barbara walters just said penis...
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
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