i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
Randomize
