can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
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