FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
You don't make any sense
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