If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
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