if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
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