Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
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