Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
Randomize
