How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
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