"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize
