remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
Randomize
