He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Randomize
