Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
Randomize